i am not my hair
One week ago I did IT. I released myself from the dismal state and condition of my damaged hair. Before you get too excited, I haven't gone natural. That would be a huge reason to celebrate, but I'm not quite there yet. I did however cut off my hair...to a short funky new do. I tell you, it was one of best things that I've done in about 2 years. Lord knows I had been holding on to those strands of hair for waaaaayyyy too long and camouflaging like a champ. Can you say...STRUGGLE!!!
Like so many African American women, I was the classic case who sat in my stylist' chair praying and hoping that she wouldn't try to get scissor happy and convince me to cut my hair. It was a battle EVERY SINGLE TIME!!...some days she'd call me out and be like, "what are we doing with this?" or, "you know that you're perpetrating, right?" HA! Don't you love it??!! Just too much, I know! But this time, I accepted my fate and came into the salon having pushed my denial aside and ready to get my head in a more healthy state. The best thing about the whole experience (because despite my willingness to cut it off, I still was apprehensive about the final outcome and had to overcome my what short hair means and looks like to other people complex going on in my mind...I know, I need to just get over it, but hey, I'm being real here!!) was that when she actually cut my hair there weren't any people in the salon other than my stylist, myself and another woman who I'd mysteriously bonded with and who by virtue of that fact become my personal cheerleading coach and encouraged me the entire way. It was perfect. I didn't need any other people in there with me, staring and doing that thing where they tilt their heads to the right, left, and back to the right again trying to make my hair cut work for me. Ummm...no thanks! So, I left feeling extremely liberated and realized that indeed, "i am not my hair", but so much more.
Like so many African American women, I was the classic case who sat in my stylist' chair praying and hoping that she wouldn't try to get scissor happy and convince me to cut my hair. It was a battle EVERY SINGLE TIME!!...some days she'd call me out and be like, "what are we doing with this?" or, "you know that you're perpetrating, right?" HA! Don't you love it??!! Just too much, I know! But this time, I accepted my fate and came into the salon having pushed my denial aside and ready to get my head in a more healthy state. The best thing about the whole experience (because despite my willingness to cut it off, I still was apprehensive about the final outcome and had to overcome my what short hair means and looks like to other people complex going on in my mind...I know, I need to just get over it, but hey, I'm being real here!!) was that when she actually cut my hair there weren't any people in the salon other than my stylist, myself and another woman who I'd mysteriously bonded with and who by virtue of that fact become my personal cheerleading coach and encouraged me the entire way. It was perfect. I didn't need any other people in there with me, staring and doing that thing where they tilt their heads to the right, left, and back to the right again trying to make my hair cut work for me. Ummm...no thanks! So, I left feeling extremely liberated and realized that indeed, "i am not my hair", but so much more.
posted by predictablelove | 5:15 PM
3 Comments:
I understand you. I used to have a perm and my hair was so unhealthy. I finally got tired of sitting for hours upon hours in the salon and boycotted the salon... i started going to the barbershop with a bunch of men... I was intimidated at first, but God led me to the right barber who was really good at cutting women's hair. I wore my hair like that for 4 years... then I got bored.. now i have had locs for 5 years now. My hair is healthier than it's ever been...rejoice in your hair... I'm rejoicing with you...
Amen!
We ARE so much more than just...hair. I can relate to the hours in salons, the scalp burns and the concern about what others would think. Life's too short.
Enjoy your new found "freedom"!
Thank you my beautiful sistahs! I hope the both of you are doing well. Have a blessed week.
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